Llamas in Orbitz (The Defunct Canadian Drink)

Gertha likes blogs.  Stay tuned for details!

But first, a charming tale full of wit and excitement:

The Adventures of the James Madison Fan Club
This episode: Blueberry Justice!

"What's that?" cried James Madison as he pranced around a mulberry bush on his imaginary horse.
"A frog," replied Abe Lincoln from behind a cherry tree (the one that George Washington didn't unleash his fury upon).
"But it has a beak," interjected Thomas Paine, who was full of common sense and desired to share it.
"Okay, so it's an orang-u-tan," Abe admitted.  "But frogs aren't hyphenated like orang-u-tans.  How unsightly!"  He fanned (and fancied) himself.
"MOO, MOO!" exclaimed John Adams in agreement, and he earnestly flapped his arms like a rather large mutant ostrich caught in the violently fatal clutches of a jell-o pudding pool.
"I hate that John Adams!  I daresay he's too tall for my liking!" snorted Abe, who then saved us all by ending the story.
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Melodramatic Musings:

People have this uncanny knack for making me want to annihilate things with my fists and my dull vegetarian stegosaurus teeth.  People make it their business to bother me.  I love Frank Perdue.  Jim Perdue is pretty cool, too.  They would never bother me.  I guess that says a lot about chickens, doesn't it?  Anyhoof, I have a lovely rubber chicken collection, and I'm always adopting.  Do you know of any rubber chickens who desire a good home?  Send them to me!  I promise to cherish your chicken!

Corollary:

If a moose sneezes in the forest, and no one is around to hear it, will the moose bless himself?

Tangent:

Opposite over adjacent.

In Conclusion:

Ditto.

P.S.: Marmaduke is not funny.